Change Isn’t Always a Bad Thing

They say the only constant in life is change.  We all know change is going to happen eventually.  We all know that nothing can stay the same forever.  Yet it seems to be human nature to fear  that inevitable change.  Rather than embracing if for what it is, we tend to resist it and fight against it until it finally overtakes us and happens anyway.

You know what, though?  Change isn’t always a bad thing.  In fact, in the grand scheme of things, it rarely ever is a bad thing.  Change challenges us.  It brings new opportunities into our life.  Most importantly, it allows us to grow…often in ways we never expected.  Yes, sometimes its hard and sometimes it even hurts.  Other times, though, it introduces us to new skills, dreams, and passions  we never new we had.

Change seems to happen in my world according to a consistent patter.  Just about the time I think I’ve got things all figured out and things start to settle down, something comes along and completely changes all the rules.  After spending many years fighting against this process, only to find myself frazzled in the end, I decided to embrace it and just see where this grand adventure we call life takes me.  It never ceases to amaze me that as soon as one door closes, another one opens and before we know it, a new adventure has begun.

Change ins’t always a bad thing!

Those of you who have known me for awhile now know that , in many ways, the big things in my life haven’t changed much.  I’m still a mom. I’m still married. I finally have my stress levels in check and I’m finally doing what I truly love doing.  I still have two kids with FASD, ADHD, a whole bunch of other stuff, and both are healing from RAD.  I also have a biological daughter who hasn’t escaped the realities of living with them, but is still a really great kid who has her own set of challenges as well.

I suppose the biggest game changer in my world over the past few years has been that my kids grew up.  They’re no longer little anymore.   My older kids are now well into their teens and my youngest is quickly approaching that stage.  We’re in the throes of all the normal stuff that parents of teenagers all go through…puberty, middle school, high school, drama with friends, changes of friends, zits, periods, prom, messy rooms, moodiness, basketball games, scouts, and busy school nights where the family is running in all different directions.

Lest any of you who are new here read that and think I can’t relate to you as a special needs parent, think again.  The fact that the above paragraph is true in my life is nothing short of a miracle.  Things haven’t always been this way.  In fact, it’s been nearly 9 very long years of getting to this point.  You can read more of my story here.

Gratefully, we have made steady progress, especially over the past couple of years.  We’ve been able to come up for air much more frequently and stay up for much longer periods of time than we used to.  Much of that is that is because my kids have all experienced some genuine healing and attachment. Some of it is due to the fact that they are all old enough now to actually help out with chores and meal preparations and yard work and other household tasks so all of that is no longer falling squarely on me and my husband anymore.   Most gratefully, though, a good portion is because we really do actually have times when we act and feel “almost” like a “normal” family…well, ok, until we actually try to interact with truly normal people, that is.  Then we remember pretty fast just how far from mainstream normal we’ve really drifted.

We used to cry about those realizations.  Now we mostly just laugh about them, embrace our weirdness, and carry on with doing what works for us and keeps everyone in the family reasonably sane and functional.  We do, of course still have a human side. We still bumps in the road and days where reality still smacks us in the face.  Those days bite! For the most part, we…as in all of us, including our kids who had a rough start in life, are able to get through it and bounce back a lot faster than we ever used to.

Though the journey is still a crazy roller coaster ride at times, it’s not the same one we used to ride.  We’ve switched tracks.  There aren’t as many cork screws and super loops on this ride as there used to be.  There are more gentle bumps and bends and level spots than there used to be. I dare now say that sometimes…many times… the ride is even fun again!

Introducing Serenity Links Coaching

Along with all of these changes has come the opportunity for me to finally do what I truly love doing and what I’ve dreamed of doing for a very long time.  I’m finally a full-fledged certified parent and family coach…and I absolutely love what I do!  I help parents of children who struggle with intense emotional and behavior issues calm the chaos, regain their footing, and restore hope, order, and serenity to their lives and families.

I am very excited about where this new adventure is heading. As the Good Book says, “to everything there is a season”…and this is finally my season to do what I love doing.  It has been in the works for quite some time and is something I’ve been working toward for a very long time.  In fact, I remember having my first serious conversation about it in 2010.

I am looking forward to being back in the ring with many of my beloved friends and “trauma mamas”.  This time, though, I’m coming in as a healthy, whole, and happy mom of healing kids who still struggle through life at times.  I have found my way out of the heavy darkness that once threatened to destroy me and my family.  I would love to help you find your way out, too!

Some of the most obvious changes you might notice is that my website is no longer just a blog.  I invite you to take some time to poke around and see what else is here.  Find out what it is that I really do and what coaching is all about.  Coaching done right isn’t just about chit-chat or getting a few new good ides to carry you through a rough patch.  Coaching is a process of positive change, healing and empowerment.  It’s very powerful stuff with some amazing benefits.  In fact, for many people, the process can actually be more effective than traditional therapy.

As you explore my site, by all means, sign up for my email list.  You’ll receive healthy parenting and relationship tips and other goodies delivered right to your inbox.  I also invite you to connect with me on Facebook and Pinterest.  If you are serious about exploring coaching as a potential option to help you and your family, I also invite you to book a complimentary Discovery session with me.  Just follow the links on my site, set your time zone, and select a time that works for you.  A Discovery session is a no cost, no obligation initial consultation designed to help you get a feel for how the coaching process works and how it can benefit your family.  If you choose to move forward, great.  If you decide it’s not for you, that’s ok too.

In addition to private 1:1 coaching services, I will also be offering a variety of online classes, webinars, and other exciting things.  In fact, I’m kicking things off right away in that department. I am offering a LIVE, interactive webinar style class on Wednesday, March 23 at 7:00 p.m. MST.  This one as a free gift to all of you warrior parents who are still struggling and looking for a way out of Crazy Town.  The catch is that seating will be limited and this will likely fill up pretty quickly. If this is something you are interested in, register right away and be sure to add it to your calendars.  It will be a fun and informative evening! I hope you’ll be able to join me.

Now that you’ve heard about me, I’d love to hear from you.  How do you feel about change?  Do you love it, hate it, or fear it?  Is there anything in your life you wish you could change but don’t know how?  Leave me a comment and share your thoughts!